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Swimming pool	mob of people with water in it.

Traffic light	apparatus that automatically turns red when your car reaches topspeed

Yawn	The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth

Politician	One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after

Optimist	A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "SeeI am not injured yet."

Opportunist	A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into ariver.

Office	A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Miser	A person who lives poor so that he can die rich

Etc.	A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Diplomat	A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip

Dictionary	A place where success comes before work.

Criminal	A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught

Conference room	A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on

Compromise	The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believeshe got the biggest piece

Classic	A book which people praise, but do not read

Cigarette	A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a foolon the other

Boss	Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early

Atombomb	An invention to end all inventions